Let Down

Once again the typical situation arrives and I'm disappointed without fail. I've been looking forward to Sunday with great anticipation and excitement. Yet, in the world of dating an officer those feelings can easily be swiped off the map. Chancho has just texted me informing me that he took on another officers paid detail because he hurt his foot and can't do it. So being the wonderful guy that he is, he decided to take his shift. In questioning him further with clenched teeth about what time it would be for, I got the lousy answer of 3pm-1135pm. Now this isn't too bad. He can still go to the beach, but he needs to leave 2 hours before 3 to make it there on time, if not 3. Which means...he'll have to leave around 12. To me that doesn't make any sense because the sun doesn't get high enough in the sky to allow you to enjoy until 12 if not 1, when he would be packing up to leave. I know I shouldn't be complaining or upset about this because he needs the money, but I was so looking forward to this day together. It would be one day out of many months that we would be able to go out at as a couple and hang out with other couples and have a normal day. Now I get less than half of a day with him. It's very frustrating. I swear if he gets an arrest tonight and he can't even come, I'm gonna have a few choice words for him. I don't know if I'm being selfish or not and I should just suck this one up to him being a cop, but I would have appreciated a thought when he decided to take his friends paid detail. He knows, or at least we've discussed how I am having trouble with him not being around a lot especially lately and for him to take this assignment makes me think he doesn't take my feelings into account. Selfish? or maybe selfless in giving up quality time to help out a friend who can't work and needs someone to cover for him.

Another point to make, he not only is letting me down by not coming, but he has a handful of friends that were hoping to spend time with him. They haven't seen him in over a month because of work. They only get a glimpse of how he's doing, by my short sentences of "oh he's good....working...a lot". Every day that he has off he is working and when he isn't, I selfishly take him for myself. I have been working on that lately, but it's been rough in the sharing department. I will leave that to me adjusting to my new lifestyle. I am so used to having only a few weeks with him when I come home from college; I keep forgetting that I am here to stay this time and I can see him any other time. I just hope that they understand and don't wind up pushing him away because he keeps canceling plans or can't make plans with them.

Quote from Chancho: The only thing worse than being a cop is dating a cop...