Tuesday, January 5, 2010


I have never really considered myself an independent person. I definitely like to have that moral support beside me, but if something needs to get done, I'll suck it up and do it.  I've secretly envied those people who could just do anything without the fear of being laughed at, making a mistake, or whatever else. Most times when I do try something new or out of the ordinary it goes just fine, so I'm not sure why it bothers me. However, dating a cop has helped me immensely in this department of developing my independence. For the first time yesterday it dawned on me how other people are very dependent upon their spouse, partner or significant other and it irritated me.
Chancho made plans, yes he made the plans!, for the group of our friends to go bowling. I needed to know the people he called just to make sure he didn't miss anyone and in figuring that out he mentioned that he wasn't sure if two of our friends were coming. Conversation went as so:
Me: "Are Zach and Savannah going?"
Chancho: "Zach said he wasn't feeling well and didn't know if he was coming."
Me: "Does that mean that Savannah isn't going?"
Chancho: "Probably, I can't see Savannah going without Zach."

It bothered me that Savannah wasn't going to join us for bowling when it was a big group of us, all her friends, just because Zach wouldn't be able to go. There have been so many times that I have gone to outings without Chancho that I can't even count anymore. I guess it just amazes me how attached people are to their surroundings and comfort zones. I can completely understand how they feel, but as I have stepped out of my comfort zone, I assume it's just harder for me to see how others can't do the same.

Listening to: "Miss Independent" by Ne-Yo
Quote of the Day: “One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: to rise above the little things.” -John Burroughs


  1. I hardly EVER go anywhere without Husband. For a mouthy, arrogant former-Marine bitch, I'm exceptionally crowd-phobic. If Husband had a callout at the last minute, all our friends would understand that I will be cancelling too. That said, last year when Husband was at the Forensics school for 5 weeks, I attended the old Chief's retirement ceremony because it was the right thing to do. I drank when I got home. (whew!)

    But as far as being harder to see how others can't do the same, I can do a six-month deployment without blinking an eye. Can you? Please remember that we are each different and just because one person can "fix" themselves doesn't mean we all can.

    And I actually am envious that you can do this. I just don't see it happening for me. But hey... I've only been married 24 years... who KNOWS what the next 25 might bring!!!!

    Anyway, just another point of view.

  2. A very good point at that. It seems as though I just wish the same "fix" upon others. You are right though, we are all different, which makes it so interesting.

  3. as long as I have a ride,I'm there! being married forever I sometimes want to go by myself even when he is here to go with me,haha!